Occupied
Last night I had a dream,
I was happy for awhile.
It all felt so real
And I woke up with a smile.
Suddenly I remembered
And my smile faded like my dream.
The day greeted me with a burden
Slamming me back to how I've been.
Life did it again,
Pulled me back to where I was;
Picking up the pieces,
Doing what I must.
As I lay here all curled up
I curse at my dream last night
Another day is wasted
With myself, another fight.
These moments of silence,
These blank stares at walls;
Messages undeleted,
A list of cancelled calls.
Who am I to control things?
Who am I to say, "come?"
These things left broken,
Things left undone.
But why do my feet
Drag in every step,
As if there's a force
Always pulling me back?
Sure, it was partly unreal
But it was also partly true;
True from where it counts
All this time I knew.
And silly as it sounds
There are some parts that linger.
I don't know if for awhile
Or if it'll stay forever.
It was a ticking time bomb
But I allowed myself to hope.
Now my hopes are in ruins
Still figuring how to cope.
'Cause when I say I mean it,
I mean it with all my heart.
My apathy is crucial
For the pieces torn apart.
It started with a splinter
Which then turned into a sting.
It got deeper like a cut,
Like there's pain in everything.
The tears will keep coming
I know it will for more...
Just until- who knows when,
When this heart is done for.
4320 hours
I smiled, I laughed, I wept.
A million more could've been
If we learned to keep what should be kept.
We still get to decide what's next,
We never know what's coming
But I know what I want to do
Though right now, I can't do anything.
This love will stay, no matter
What's done can't be undone.
They can all try their luck
But this heart has room for only one.