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I Know Better
by Nicole  Arias

And to think, I would have given anything
just to be near you.
You want so much, for yourself...
so many dreams, goals you want to reach.
And to think, I wanted to help you reach them.
I am capable, but I don't have to tell you that.
I am good for you... and you weren't wrong,
when you said, "I" was the best thing 
that ever happened to you. 
One day, you'll know that, 
when she's gone,
and you're still struggling to find yourself.
Your completeness.
You see, it never mattered 
how much you cared
or thought you did 
and it made no difference 
how much I did or didn't do. 
With all my love and everything and every piece...
of myself I gave to you, 
it wouldn't ever be enough.
When you're looking for comfort, for understanding,
I am not the one you feel happy with.
I am not the one you can relate to. 
I want all there is
and I am not afraid to do what it takes.
To someone like you, I know this is a threat... 
I'm sorry.
I am not the person 
who can justify your lack 
of strength or discipline or success...
the way she can, nor would I want to.
I know how amazing you can be!
She accepts you 
and her presence makes you feel 
as though everything's ok.
Yet, I know who you want to be 
and it's not the man you've been all these years, 
you want "normal".
Does she make you... "want to be a better man",
the way I know you want to be.
Can you reach for the stars upon her shoulders?
I know better, 
I know you... and you are full with fear.
And maybe, just maybe you see that in her, 
making you love her so much... 
she knows your pain,
she's had your life and she makes you feel 
like you're not the only one...
but what about tommorow?
what about "normal"?
She can't give this to you, I promise.
Sometimes it's easier to walk beside a mirror...
just remember they can only reflect what's behind you.
Better to settle than to strive, 
you can't fail if you never really try...
Safe, yes. But there's no pride to be felt. 
Will you ever know the sweetness of victory?
How long can this go on?
How many people will come and go 
before you focus on the most important... "yourself".
Be brave, go for what you deserve 
even if it's not with me...
don't wake up 50 with empty hands,
do it for you, do it for you!
Don't fool yourself, "you are me" remember?
I let it go for my sake, not yours.
You should do the same -for your sake, not hers.
I say this not because I love you...
but because I know better.
        
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Poem ID: 11841   Poem Posted: 3/3/1999
Viewed: 4101  Voted On: 36  E-mailed: 26  Commented On: 1
 
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