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Poem: Dear Heroin

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Dear Heroin
by Christine Teresa Benitez
I am angry..
You made me believe 
you were the cure for my every kind of pain,
I had you wrapped around me 
while I let you take control of my veins.

At this point in time 
I didn't know who or what you turned me into,
But you made it impossible 
to get through days without you.

You had control of my body now, 
and if I didn't choose you,
you made me feel so sick 
to where I was helpless not knowing what to do.

By now I started doing the things 
I swore I would never do,
lying and stealing from the people 
who didn't mean a thing to you.

You had me convinced that throughout my life 
you were determined to stay, 
that I did not have the option 
of turning and walking away.

Before I knew it, everyone I loved saw a side of me 
that was hurting them inside, and 
every time they questioned,
I did what you taught me to do... Lie.

I wanted to let you go 
and get you out of my way, 
so scared to tell someone 
imagining what they would say.

Don't want to be judged, 
it was a decision I would have to make, 
but I've wasted so much time, 
it was a little too late.

Being put in jail 
was something I knew it was going to come down to, 
but it made me free of relief 
knowing that I could not get to you.

It was a struggle, 
but a worth while fight 
because now I am in control 
and you are out of my life.

Being sober turned me into the person 
I've always wanted to be, 
and that was the one day 
you were praying I would never see.

Now I am doing the good things 
I never imagined myself to do, 
and proudly I can say... 
I am doing them without you

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