by little one
I was never really a happy person to begin with. I never thought I was pretty or anything…. Then, when I was in 9th grade I started being really good friends with this guy. I started to have a lot of feeling for him, I feel in love with him, I thought he felt the same way- but he didn’t…. I would do anything to be with, I loved this boy so much. I started to do drugs. I started fighting with my family for no reason- when me and him would not get along. I stopped hanging out with my friends so I could be with him all the time. Then I soon started to cut my wrist. It felt so good- it took away from all the pain I was feeling at the second. I then stopped eating because he told me I was getting fat. Then, after two years of me giving him everything, he told me he didn’t see us working out. Then I tried to kill myself- by overdosing…
When I was happy I would love to hang out with friends so much. My friends used to mean everything to me. I used to want to be around my family. When I was happy I thought good about myself. When i was sad I would think- “Why ain’t I good enough for anybody?”
I knew I was depressed but I didn’t do anything to fix it. But then my best friend saw something on my wrist and told my mom that she should talk to me. I did find someone to talk to. I had an aunt and I had my best friend... But most of the time I just kept it to myself.
The turning point was when my Mom said something to me… Then she made me go stay someplace for a week. In that week I learned a lot. But there was a poem on LovePoetry that really helped called A teenager! by Jana Kaye Miller.
I’m so much happier now. I have a boyfriend of almost 8 months. We are so in love with each other. I am almost done with high school. I have about 7 months to go. My boyfriend just told me the other day I will be getting a promise ring for Christmas. I was so happy when he told me that… I’ve started hanging out with some of my old friends and I even found some new ones. I’m even getting a long with my family! I got put on many different meds. But it was hard to find the one that was right for me. However, they finally gave me one that has really seemed to help me.
If you are one that is out there with a story like mine, or anybody else out there- get help! Trying to end your life is not the way to go. Remember… in the end you won’t just leave scars on your wrist but you will leave scars on all the people who love you so much!
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