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A GIRL COULD ONLY TAKE SO MUCH
by SAD GIRL

When I was 14, my family moved into a new house. That was where I met him... he was my next-door neighbor. We started out talking as friends, but he would tell me nice things and kiss me and tell me I was really special.

He always seemed like a player because I would always see him with hickies on his neck. I didn't feel like I had any right to say anything about it then because I wasn't really his girl. Then, one day he took my virginity and I got pregnant. I was young and afraid and brain-washed. His mother came to my house one day and told me to leave him alone because he had just had a baby with someone else. I was 6 months pregnant and no one else knew that he was the dad, but I was willing to stay with him, regardless of the fact that he had another kid.

I read the LovePoetry poem In love with a player by Ashley S. and I realized that's what he was... a player. I was then, 8 months pregnant. He had moved in with another girl, but he was also dating a girl from my high school and 2 weeks later... she was also pregnant, and so I decided to leave him. It was really hard to try to stay away from him while I was carrying his child. I went into a depression. It was just so hard to accept that the man I loved- the father of my son... was a player.

My son is now 5 years old. His father has never seen him. I still remember him sometimes. I still cry at night and I still ask myself, "Where did I go wrong?" It still hurts but hopefully, one day I'll get over it. The only thing that puts a smile on my face every morning is my "lil' angel"... my son.

I did move on. I have a boyfriend and we have been together for 3 years, but I still think about my son's father everyday. It still hurts that he would never take responsibility for his son, but sometimes I feel my son is better off without him.

Love is blind, but no matter how much you feel like you love that person, there is always a limit.


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