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by Always and for never

When I was about 11, my parents split and turned to drugs. This made me really depressed. I didn't know who to turn to. I don't know why, but I didn't feel I could tell anyone who would understand. So, about a month later I started cutting myself. I guess I thought the only way to get away from the pain was to cause more.

I was happier when I was younger and my parents were together. I thought everything was perfect then. During the happier times, when my parents were together, we used to do everything as a family, but once they split up I didn't even know what a "family" was anymore.

I realized I was depressed when I would just cry myself to sleep, hearing my mom in the other room with a different guy every night. That was about the time I became suicidal. I didn't have anyone to turn to, which made it even worse.

I was at the edge, I had about all I could handle. Then, one day I went to LovePoetry and read the poem [[[I Don't Understand//Cindy Michelle Wood//48640]]. It made me realize that no matter how sad I am, if I ever did that I would make even more people sad... people I loved and I realized it wasn't even worth it to put people in that kind of pain.

Things have changed since I read the poem. Now I know I can handle it. Everyone goes through pain at some point in their life, you just have to deal with it.

I have done some things differently. I talked to my mom and dad about their "problems" and told them everything. They couldn't believe they were so blind that they couldn't see how much pain I was in.

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