Two Hearts Torn
by hurting and stronger
My husband and I were married for one year. I was 19 when we got married and he was 17. I was very eager to get married because we had a baby on the way. He loved me then.
While I was pregnant, we were so happy. I went into preterm labor five times and he was always there. He defended me in everything I did. He loved me unconditionally. I have never been happier in my life.
Our marital troubles began after three months. He was on drugs and he started cheating on me. He beat me with my son in my arms and he was jealous that I spent more time with our son than with him. I put up with it for 3 years. I have been beaten in the head so badly that I now have migraines and I have to wear glasses. I tried to love him, I tried to be there for him, but he just kept pulling me down with him. He would tell me he loved me and he was sorry. He said it would never happen again.
I decided to leave him after he totaled my car while he was on drugs. He had two other girls with him. I didn't really want the divorce. I kind of still don't, but I filed the papers anyway. I read the LovePoetry poem called I HATE... by Lauren Berry Cowan, and it has helped me a lot.
He is with a girl now, who will do drugs with him. He takes his new girlfriend around my family so he knows it will get back to me. He has nothing to do with our son. I raise him all by myself. He doesn't even have a job to help support our son. All he cares about is his new girlfriend. He told me he never wanted me or our son. My life, now is hard. I am working two jobs to support my baby.
You don't know someone until you marry them. Don't let a man hit you. If a man hits you once, he will do it again no matter how much he cries and says he is sorry. The hardest thing to do is put one foot in front of the other and walk away, but, don't look back, especially if you have kids. If he will hurt you, eventually he will hurt your kids. Real love doesn't come with abuse- the two don't mix.
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