I Thought He Was For Real
by hurt but stronger
My ex-boyfriend and I started goin' out at the age of 15. I felt like our love was special and too good to be true. We were together for a year and we did everything couples do. We shared feelings, we kissed, held hands, talked and we spent a lot of time together.
We broke up because our communication broke down. He said that I treated him like crap and he couldn't control his feelings. I thought love conquered all so I decided to talk to him about it to see if we could make it better. Then, two weeks after we broke up, he started liking my best friend. This girl was like my sister and come to find out, she liked him too. I was really hurt. Every day, every hour, and every second that we were together he would tell me how much he loved me. Now, because of him I'm scared to fall in love. I'm scared to believe in love. It really hurts because I cared a lot about him and it seems like he didn't care about me or love me at all. Plus, my so-called best friend turned out to be traitor, and now it's hard to even call her a friend.
When I turned to LovePoetry.com, OUR LOVE by RACHEL LOUISE SMITH made me realize that others have gone through the same thing and it's hard to get over it, even when you meet someone different. I started writing poetry and songs to help me get through. Maybe I was just too young to get into a real relationship, or maybe he wasn't mature enough handle one, but our breakup has made me stronger. Now I'm careful of how I think of people. The problem is that now I have huge trust issues in my life. Almost a year later, I still can't trust people... I can't trust love.
I still talk to my ex-boyfriend and I even talk to the girl who used to be my best friend, but it's not the same as before. I'm the kind of person who forgives but doesn't forget, and I will never forget what they did to me. I've met other guys, but I'm scared to be hurt again so I keep it distant. It may not be the best way to do things, but I don't want to go through the same thing again.
My advice to others is that although you may love someone, you'll never know if they really love you back. "I love you," means more than what it sounds like. It's not a word you tell someone just because it sounds pretty or sweet- it means much more. Someday, that special someone will come along and replace the love that hurt you. It won't be easy, but you need to try to trust love again, even if it takes forever.
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